Tag Archive for gratitude

Client Success: Lynne Barfield Byrd’s memoir “The Sweetness and The Pits”

Lynne.Barfield.Byrd.The.Sweetness.And.The.Pits_Front“Well, I am a bucket-list kind of girl,” said Lynne Barfield Byrd, 76, who with motivation of said list has earned three advanced degrees including a Masters in Historic Preservation, ran the Peachtree Road Race at age 67, performed in stage musicals, and traveled to England, France and Italy. “Writing my memoir was on my bucket list to complete by September of 2015, and by golly, I did it! I feel wonderful!”

The Sweetness and The Pits: Remembrances of a Georgia Peach chronicles her life through childhood, careers, and relationships with family, friends and community in her native Atlanta. Lynne has lived in Morningside, Virginia Highlands, Sandy Springs, and Doraville before making Dunwoody her home for the last 43 years. After graduating from Grady High, she attended the University of Georgia, Georgia Perimeter College, and Georgia State University.

On Saturday, October 10 from 2-4pm, Lynne will sign books at the Cheek-Spruill House a.k.a. the Dunwoody Farmhouse located at 5455 Chamblee-Dunwoody Road, one of the three Dunwoody homes she has placed on the National Register of Historic Places.

Her life has had peachy parts, but also some that were the pits. “My first attempt at writing a short memoir left out all of the unpleasant things. I left out a lot! I was surprised at how emotional it was to go back and feel the joy and the sorrow, and actually put it on paper, knowing that I will allow it to be read by strangers.”

After completing a solid draft, Lynne began to work with me after our meeting at the Writer’s Forum at the Dunwoody/Dekalb Library.

“Wayne explained the entire process, and I knew what to expect,” Lynne shared. “He made sure that as he edited, my voice in the book remained clear. Though this and publication, even when discussing thoughts on what might be hurtful to someone when they read my book, Wayne kept the process fun.”

The book has already garnered sales and great word-of-mouth from those in her community circles. It has also spawned new relationships. Lynne.Barfield.Byrd.Author“Yes, it’s like when you are having surgery—all of a sudden every other person has had, or is having, the same! People who want to write are drawn to me because I tried it. I have connected with another first-time author and a would-be first time author, and I can pick their brains and they can pick mine.”

Her best advice is simple: “Enjoy yourself and write, write, write. Maybe it will be a hit, maybe it won’t, but you won’t know unless you write.”

A few days before publication, Lynne was back in the classroom expanding her knowledge and skill with creative writing. This Georgia Peach is proud of her accomplishment, but will continue to add new goals to her bucket list and be motivated to learn and express.

Pleas and Thank Yous

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After my morning ritual of journaling the cobwebs from my head, stretching the cricks from my joints, then feeding my body tea, fruit and grain, I felt jaunty, ready to go.

As I passed my desk, I noticed a text from an inner circle friend sharing that a mutual friend had suddenly passed away.

Instinctively, I sat down.  I stared at the screen’s stark words.  I knew my friend was hurting, too, yet the words seemed so flat on the phone.  Maybe it’s not true, I begged.  I read them over and over trying out every interpretation to deny the obvious as I felt my energy sink from the top of my head into a dense lump below my stomach.

Suddenly processing another significant loss, I recalled Mother’s Day just weeks before, the first since Mom died last October.  Getting ready to drive to my hometown and join the family, something had set me off, and my ‘stuff’ had risen and roared.  I called another inner circle friend who listened, allowed me to be mad, suggested ideas, then consoled while cajoling me to a happier, healing place.  I felt better, the rolling boil reduced to a steaming simmer.  Then she gently asked, “Have you written a letter to your mother telling her how much you miss her?”

Tears welled, and I could hardly take the breath to say ‘thanks’ before hanging up.  I slumped into my desk chair and through my puddled vision, found the home keys.

“Dear Momma…”

After wrapping up the letter, I sat spent.  I rested, but soon scolded myself for being a writing coach to others, yet I hadn’t identified what I needed.  I’d journaled about Mom all week acknowledging the significance of the coming holiday, but didn’t reach the core of complete expression, much less release.  Like when I encountered a display of Mother’s Day cards at the grocery store, felt the onset of pain and quickly pushed my buggy around the glaring truth, the overture was obvious.  Still, I pleaded for the opposite, politely notating the incident in my journal without divining its essence.

Putting avoidance and perfection aside, I finally spotted the depth of my hurt, as well as the stealthy way I’d skirted around it, and then wrote and nurtured myself.  Simultaneously, I gave thanks to Mom for all the love she’d shared and lessons she’d taught, to my friend for her compassionate encouragement, and to myself for opening again to full expression and accepting guidance.

Now, in the chair with phone still in hand, I sat with my present loss.  I had lost a new friend, someone I knew for only a year, but one who expanded my heart and broadened my thinking while providing safety for me to share, ask personal questions, as well as listen to her truth.  I had bonded with her kind, unassuming spirit, a unique presence draped with honor and love.

Recently, I pondered plans to spend time deepening our friendship into the inner circle.  Unexpectedly, all that remained were memories of someone special who gave so much in such a brief time.rose.petals

So, I asked myself the question, “Can I tell her how much she meant to me and how much I will miss her?”  I put down my phone and ceremonially placed fingers on home keys.  My breathing deepened, my eyes dampened, and with courage and gratitude, I listened, and my mourning ritual began.

“Dear Shauna…”

Today Is A Holiday Of Gratitude

gratitude.journalLike a giant, motorized float, gratitude is paraded out and cheered at Thanksgiving, its ultimate holiday.  Many acknowledge what they are grateful for, even announcing it while sitting at a table with family, friends and a sumptuous feast, truly a gratitude-inducing event.  This continues into the year-end holidays, again around food, but with the addition of decorations, lights, music, and gifts.  We give and receive, grateful for both.

But what happens when the celebrations are over, the bright lights and decorations put away, and the gray of winter settles in?  Often, it’s simply cold, damp and colorless.  Do you still feel gratitude?

During these times, it’s often more profound to feel it, to seek and find the tiniest little things, mundane even, to be grateful for.

Consider uplifting this recognition through the practice of journal writing.

Write your gratitude in a little notebook, perhaps one you like and are grateful for.  Type it on a computer or in the notes app on your SmartPhone.  Send yourself gratitude text messages.  Try different ways; keep the practice fresh.

Write these items in simple lists, or jot notes down with goofy doodles next to them, or write five each morning as a great way to start a new day, or highlight several points of gratitude within a story.

Think about specifying topics from your life that are important or you want to become important.  Do any of these headings make you feel grateful just to consider focusing upon them?

  • My Healthier Food Diet
  • Building Community
  • Something New Today
  • Strengthening My Body
  • Expanding Relationships
  • Relaxation in Stressful Situations
  • Loving Myself
  • My Writing Practice

Be grateful for your creativity and expression.  Play, and feel the thankfulness well up in your body and fill your spirit.  Read your gratitude journal along the way; your words will inspire more joy to write about and live from.

Having gratitude opens your heart to receive experiences you dream of.   It feels good and allows more good.  And the more you practice living with gratitude, the more you instantly recognize good in your life.